we often lose sight of why we want to do certain things. is it to serve as a proof to others? is it to make yourself feel good when being recognised? or are you expecting some form of reward out of your acts?

expectations kill. no matter how much you think that youre intrinsically motivated to do some stuff, because you truly think that it's for the better good, the expectations that you're trying to meet doesnt make you that bit happier of your choice to perform. expectations you impose on others to at least be thankful about what you do that would help them, makes you disappointed when they dont, when they in fact start taking things for granted, being increasingly demanding of you. we always project our thoughts and actions upon others, but when things dont turn out to be so, we're annoyed. reciprocity does not come naturally to all. being appreciative may not even dawn upon some. expectations of karma, and justice, or even fairness, simply destroys that bit of joy in you to do things, even if it's stated to be for yourself, but how much can you deny that youre just as concerned of how others view you and what you do?

sometimes, someday, everyone should just think, what would happen if we dont have all these people around us? how different would it be if we hadnt met them? what would we have lost? what if we're just left alone, fighting by ourselves? what do they bring us?

so what if we start thinking about all these now? we do get more appreciative of people around us and things happening to us.. but we're just too stingy with praises, with thanks, with expressing our true thoughts and feelings to others.. if the others never ever know about it, whats the point of self-reflection?

showing gratitude may be a too-heavy word. being appreciative may be too awkward for a start. start small from giving thanks. that few words of encouragement and reassurance, small acts of thanks, simple phrases of praises, can brighten someone's day. if making them feel good makes you as well, what's wrong with that few possible moments of embarrassment and awkwardness? should know that they're ey are just simple acts of care.