it seems like being alone makes you think more about things around you.
things that you have always taken for granted, things that you have missed out in your daily life,
even things that you thought that might be trivial or went unnoticed.
especially friends.
sometimes, it's ironic.. so are you still taking friends as people to eliminate boredom?
or are you really just wanting to treasure them and times spent with them?
i dont know. especially when how you think is different from how they take it to be.

yesterday went for a school tour with jimmy :)
guess i had been a bad host for this period lol, hope he had had a great relaxing holidays here in singapore :)
talked for quite awhile with him, and he made me realise that i had been living in my own kind of world..
it's pretty much a bad thing to ignore what others want of you, as bad as how much you care about what others want.
guess it's pretty much time for me to grow up.
what do i in fact want from life? what kind of stories do i want to tell others about myself?
some mundane everyday trivial details?
i really hope to create some kind of difference, but it really depends on how much i want to, how determined i am to eliminate these obstacles and others' expectations.
it all stems from me, myself and i.
it's true, to a great extent, that we had always been blaming the circumstances and missed chances for things that we were unable to accomplish.
but, for me, i guess it's just that lack of will to search for more opportunities.

i need a change. would you help me?
even if you will, please dont. please tell me straight in my face that, it's my own life. yolo.
:)

felicia